A funny story

When I was a small child. I was given a small model of Noah’s Ark that came with six wooden animals. Two lions, two alligators, and two giraffes. At the time I thought six animals was more then enough to save the world. I didn’t need anything more complicated.

So I was sitting in the living room playing happily with my small animals and eventually decided I needed to load them onto the ark. First, the giraffes that fit nicely in the wooden structure. So I moved on to the alligators that also seemed to fit just right. I was very pleased by this.

This is where I encountered a small problem.

Apparently the makers of this ark had made a fatal design flaw. You see, you could only fit four of the animals onto the boat. No matter how many ways I attempted to stuff the two wooden lions into the ark they simply would not go in. This ruined my perception on god. I was very angry and decided god had lied to me and threw away the whole idea of religion.

So I had been a good Catholic for four years.

The Things I can Never Know

Today I wondered about everything and nothing. How is it possible to have a concept of nothing? Even in your concept you must have something to represent 'nothing' so by that logic, isn't it impossible to have a real concept of nothing? It is a weird thought and it began while I was discussing the creation of the Universe.

I was sitting in the passenger seat in my mind, discussing with my mother about some Religious concept. She is a set Atheist while I tend to lean more Agnostic. We were discussing the 'Goldilocks Zone' as it is called. What this is, is the exact set of conditions a planet, like Earth, must have to support life. For example the planet must be an exact distance away from it's nearest star (the sun is 93000000 miles away). The planet must be tilted in the exact right way. It must spin at a certain speed. The conditions must be exact. I think, as the book I was reading suggests, if these conditions were off by a mere 10-15 millimeters life would not be sustainable as is on this planet.

It makes every day a little more beautiful, knowing exactly how rare we are. There is only a .001387% chance that we even exist scientifically speaking yet here we are. Even if the big bang happened as we think it did, the likely hood of our planet ever coming into existence is so small. That is when I brought up the Theory of God. Could we really have gotten here all on our own? With those odds is it remotely possible that a supreme being helped in our creation. Or, if not a being, what about some cosmic energy of some sort. A force, many might call it, that holds all existence together.

But of course the thought had to pop into my head 'then where did this supreme being or force come from?'. This is when I tried, in vain to imagine nothing. No space, no stars, no sky, no... well anything. It was so beyond what my brain could comprehend that I couldn't even envision it. It makes me wonder if something was ALWAYS here. Always has been here. Was this Universe created by the destruction of another Universe? Is there a supreme being? Or, could we really be a cosmic coincidence?

The problem is we can not tell for certain what happened. Maybe the Scientologists are right ad it really was the evil space king Xenu. Faith comes for me in small bursts, hence I am not able to completely renounce a higher power. Sometimes I feel like there must be a creator, then I look at scientific facts and realize that is illogical too.

Maybe I must realize there are things I can never know.