Twirling through sick lullabies
Joking on your alibis
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes....
'Cause I'm Mr. Brightside.
Right now I am losing friends, whither it be some selfish impulse they have, or my plain distaste for some people I used to be close to. But is it a loss? Why do I need friends who want to see me when they find it convenient to give me a call once in a while. Why do I need friends who talk about me when I am not around. I cannot fathom why I have put up with some of this for so long. So to all the fair-weather friends, goodbye. I am sorry that we could not be friends longer, but I have to say goodbye.
This view makes the world a little lonely, I will not lie. I feel high school is completely gone and all the friendships have slipped slowly with it. I remember things through a haze, like it is slowly fading from view. And yes, right now, I am a little lonely. But I need to leave the past behind.
Maybe that is theme to this post. I am shedding my skin, and leaving the past behind. I am stepping into a new world. It looks bright with opportunity. In two months, I will start beauty school. It is a new beginning for me, and I look forward to it. I have kept people in my life who I realize are my true friends. Everyone always says, after high school you only keep the friends who really matter. I never believed the scores of adults who told me that until right now. I have kept the most wonderful boyfriend who reminds me everyday that I need to keep walking. He never does it for me, but has inspired me to take that first step and now that I have, I refuse to stop.
I began this post feeling bitter and hurt, but as I let my fingers flow the words have formed their own beautiful words of renewal. I let go all my bitterness towards people who hurt me, and I am open to mend those bridges. I need to let it all go. So as I walk forward into the future I will leave all resent behind and...
Open up my eager eyes
Because I'm Mr. Brightside
Lizzey Cameron writing here:
ReplyDeleteWren, this sounds like a good step for you. :) I'm proud of you, it takes some guts to stand up and walk on your own feet.
Also, basically, (and you know this already, which is why you called me for the past god-knows-how-many years) I suck at calling! I am getting better (and once I have a new gosh-darned phone!) I will be able to call YOU every weekend to find out how you are. I know I need to make more of an effort to be a good friend, and starting today will reform and change my ways. And dude, don't be afraid to hold me to it! :P
Example:
Wren: Lizzey, you're not making an effort to be a good friend. I'm calling you all the time, and it's wearing me out.
Lizzey: RIGHT SAH, I'M ON IT. Like white on rice, baby! -phones rings off the hook like whoa-
I know we haven't been talking as much in the past few months... and that's why I feel like a lot of this post was directed to me. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't but I'm really sorry you feel this way. :( I honestly feel terrible that I haven't been able to talk to you as often as I liked - I miss our crazy 5 hour phone conversations! =( You're still one of my best friends - practically I feel like you're my sister, no matter what. And I don't want to lose you! :( So please, don't cut me out of your life! I love you and always will no matter what!!!
Long story short: I hope you keep me, love? I haven't talked behind your back, and whilst I can get annoyed at you rarely, I never stay mad at you because I love you! And yeah, I'm stupid-busy sometimes, and really should call you but phone-calling anxiety got in the way! Now that that shit is overwith, I promise from this day forward to be a better friend. Scout's honor!
(Hrm, also I remember dancing to Mr. Brightside in the car as kids. Remember that? :P xD)
Also: I hope you haven't developed a distaste for me. :( I would do my best to understand though, if you did.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your new era. Love you.
Lizzey. xoxoxoxoxox