Heavy in Your Arms

' I was a heavy heart to carry,
My beloved was weighed down.
My arms around his neck,
My fingers laced a crown.
I was a heavy heart to carry
But he never let me down.
When he held me in his arms
My feet never touched the ground...

I'm so heavy. Heavy, heavy in your arms.'


Like songs I feel emotion flowing through me right now. All of them swelling and receeding as the days go by. I know no one reads these anymore, but even still I feel like spilling my heart to no one in particular. Yet my words always remain locked deep in the recesses of my mind.

Why am I so afraid to speak the words that implore me day after day to pass my lips? And yet when I open them no sound passes. Fear and trepidation always takes me and binds my chest, and I feel like the words I had so yearned to speak choke me. It is around this time I withdraw. Returning to the vices that keep my mind occupied, not allowing it to wonder.

It is a foolish task, a temporary solution. Yet even as I know it is wrong I feel myself choke. What a dilema.

I feel very heavy.

Yet are not the truths heavy too? Would they not cause the problems that I so fear?

Maybe I am too insure of myself. Either way it is bringing me down.